Randomly Random Thoughts.

My views are coming close to catching hubby's. You see, he hasn't posted since the end of July. Now, his entries are a lot more detailed and take much more work than mine. And his blog is much more anthology-based than mine. It's strictly a collection of his experiences.

Still, he's been slacking.

But all this time, his views consistently climb. It's not just feeding off other blogs. I think a ton of people who don't officially follow his blog still come by.

Fair enough.

Last night, I came within three hundred views. It was close....I was going to pass him again. Then somehow, some way.......the next time I checked his page.....he had picked up around three or four hundred more views!

I have no idea how this is happening. He's far too impatient to go to his own blog and hit the refresh button over and over again.

And in a day or two or three, he'll sit his ass down, and finish an entry he's been working on. And his views will shoot up like he injected Cialis into his blog.

This is the blogging equivalent of Promethius--or whoever it was--pushing that fucking rock up a hill only to see it fall back down again and again.

The sad irony? He couldn't care less about his views. Not one bit. And that's what drives me crazy!

If I didn't love him, I'd like beat him up or something.

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My newest best friend forever, Svetlana, and I not only share an interest in topics of a sexual nature, but our birthdays are on one and the same day! Yayyyyyyyyyyy!

Uh....she's celebrated fewer than I..... Maybe I should beat up my hubby to make up for my pretend mid-life crisis. That'll learn him!

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Okay, Mitzie's royal girlfriend, CG, has--ever since we've known her--insisted that not only do unicorns exist, but that she has every intention of getting one.

Okay, fine. Then a few weeks ago, CG comes in and says to hubby, "If I find a unicorn, I can have one, right?"

"Absolutely."

And CG goes back up to her apartment, happy as always.

Okay, time to talk to the spouse.

"Really? REALLY? They don't exist!"

"Alex, have you ever seen a unicorn?"
"Of course not."

"Then how do you know that they don't exist?"

Okay, THAT'S something CG would say. Oh well. Like everyone else, he adores CG, so hey, if CG can find a unicorn, she can have one.

Then a few days ago, Lori posts the following picture on CG's Facebook page.

The lovely girl on the horse is Charlie Laine, who is a big time porn star. She does only solo and girl-girl scenes. And Charlie is very active on Twitter and posted this.

So........if I were a conspiracy nut.....

Lori calls Charlie. Charlie then gets on a horse with a fake horn on it. Charlie then posts this on Twitter and Lori posts it on FB.

Nah. But if anyone COULD get Charlie in on something like this, it would probably be Lori.

A professional shot of Charlie.

Back in the day, the early nineties, my porn crush was an insanely hot lady named Victoria Paris. Now, my porn crush is devoted to Charlie!

Oh have mercy.

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I chatted a few times, quite awhile back, with a guy who was fairly nice. He came here, read the blog and even the Rules of Engagement and PM'd me. Hey, if some guy bothers to read a side-blog as well as the main blog, that's impressive.

So we talked. Pretty nice guy. We chatted once in awhile, but not consistently.

Then he started pushing to meet. I said no. Then again. And he expected not only to meet me, but Lori and Shelly.

To top it off, this was a guy with no profile pic and wouldn't even say what part of the country he lived in or even his first name. Seriously. And yet, I was supposed to meet him.

Yes, I'm going to order these grown women to come over and fuck some guy I met in a fucking chat room. Really?

He said that rules were made to be broken. I said that rules were made to be followed. Then I told him that I was putting him on ignore and that he wasn't welcome at Lexenomics any longer. I can't keep him from visiting, but fuck, if he's reading this, then, well.....

Suck it. And go away. You aren't welcome here. You overstepped your bounds. You knew the rules and decided, hey, they didn't apply to you. They did.

But he did inspire me to create a new side-blog, "I Will Not Meet You."

So if you're a girl, please heed my warning. There are inherent dangers to sleeping around. When your gut says something is wrong, it's because usually something is. That gut feeling is a sixth sense. Your instincts aren't wrong.

Better safe, than sorry. And you know what? Apply this to guys, as well. If you must meet someone off-line, be wary. Be careful. Listen to your gut, not your pussy or dick.

It's not their job to keep you out of trouble. All they care about is getting you laid and some serious orgasms. That's fine. That's their job.

But being safe? That job belongs to your brain and instincts. If you're going to make a mistake, make sure that mistake is in being overly cautious, not the opposite. Cautious will never hurt you; recklessness often will.

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Now there's another guy, he's awesome. Dodger fan that lives in Florida. Super-cool guy. I talk to him every few weeks. Major-league handsome, too. I just wanted to give him a shout-out.

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Boy, Facebook is addictive. Not to hubby. He has a page, but gets on it like once every ten days. Me? I have to get on it every day. I think I need to enter rehab.

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Someone emailed hubby. "No way do I believe your blog. All your supposed girlfriends are pretty." Hubby emailed back, "Yeah, I should only fuck ugly women. Is your wife, daughter, sister or mother available?"

Cold, but hilarious!

Hey, if you're going to say something stupid, you're not going to be treated well. Just something to keep in mind on your journey through life. Remember: you're owed nothing and you'll be treated according to how you behave. That simple.

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Mind putting down your pitchforks and torchs for a sec? I'll be as succinct as possible.

We could wait until all the facts come out in the Joe Paterno controversy or take the stance of this self-righteous know-it-all. But then again, what sports magazine is more politically correct and self-righteous than this once-great-but-now-crappy publication, Sports Illustrated? Don't answer, it's a rhetorical question.

Outside of Don Banks and Peter King, its rubbish.

Now, I could go into protocol and procedure and whether did Paterno do or not do enough, blah, blah, but I won't. All I will say is that protocol and procedure are written for a reason and are to be followed for a reason.

But it's scapegoat time, and before any rationale and reason can enter the discussion, Paterno will be the former coach of Penn State. I'm not saying that Paterno shouldn't go. I'm not saying that he should. But why not wait for everything to settle down just a touch?

Nah. He has to go. Our moral indignation has spoken. And the lynch mob will pat itself on the back that it took action swiftly and decisively.

Oh....one TEENY TINY pesky fact for you in the mob to chew on. The former coaching assistant, Jerry Sandusky, hasn't actually been.....you know.....convicted of a fucking thing. Well, yet. But where's there's smoke there's fire.

Or is there?

There was plenty of smoke during the McMartin preschool scandal in the 1980s. And after years of court action and trials, and lead stories and front page headlines, it turned out to be just that: smoke. Yet when that broke, you would swear that these horrible people had repeatedly molested every child that walked in there or set foot within a two-mile range of the preschool. Didn't quite turn out that way in the end, though.

Ah, but we acted swiftly and decisively then, didn't we? There was smoke! We responded with anger, indignation, revulsion and every other emotion deemed worthy of the event.

That's the part that didn't make the front page.

The McMartins weren't the only ones, either. There have been many people wrongly convicted and sent to prison based upon the testimony of children and court-appointed "experts" wih their own agendas.

But don't let that little inconvenient fact stop you. Don't let the fact that no investigation that probed any of Paterno's action or inaction over the past several years has been conducted slow you down.

All the news that fits, right? Shoot first, ask later. Shooting first and shooting fast always results in a bullseye, right?

One more thing: all this "As a parent, I....." crap? That's bullshit. Anybody of reasonable mind feels child molestation is a horrible thing. I know it's shocking to you parents, but us childless folks don't deem this crime to be anything but horrid.

And if you use it to advance the argument/agenda that Joe Paterno must go right now right this second it can't come fast enough justice must be served if you don't agree you like child abuse you fucking pervert, it's just self-serving. And it's really insulting, to be honest.

Think about it.

Paterno's had a stellar civil and professional record for over sixty years. Read it again. Sixty years. Has that not earned him at least enough benefit of the doubt so that he isn't run off in a whopping 72 hours? Or is everybody so anxious to win the "I'm More Righteous and Indignant Than You" Sweepstakes that six decades of good citizenship is irrelevant?

Nah. It's not like we have to worry about buyer's remorse. You only get that after you give up something of value (money, usually) and end up buying something we didn't want after all. Everybody who slandered and prosecuted the McMartins suffered no remorse. Nobody will here, either.

I can guarantee you this as well: some chucklehead is going to use what I just said as some kind of proof that I'm an apologist for Paterno.

That's just the collateral damage you get when you don't endorse the rush to judgement.

I'm just waiting for Gloria Allred to find a way to weasle her self-serving ass into this.

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